Everyone Else Is Better At This Than Me

How to deal with Imposter Syndrome - Pt. 1

Everyone I follow is better at content than I am, who am I to think I can be a content creator?

I’m not as good at running an online business as my friends, I feel like such a fraud.

It seems like everyone else is more confident in working with clients than I am, I must not be as good of a coach as they are.

Is anyone going to care about what I have to say? I’m so boring compared to everyone else! I’m not qualified to do any of this, really…

Ahhhh imposter syndrome… that bittersweet old chestnut. 🌰

It comes in many forms and many ways of thought and feeling, but I’ll bet that we’ve all felt it in some way or another, yes?

It’s that feeling that everyone else around you deserves to be in the space you’re in, a little more than you - whether you think it’s because others are more qualified than you, more gifted, more professional, more talented, smarter, what have you…

And hey, let’s be real, it sucks.

Over the years, I’ve seen almost every person I’ve ever worked with grapple with some version of this at one point or another. Myself included!

The thing that sucks is it has the power to stop us in our tracks, second guess ourselves, make us back off of following our growth or sharing our work, because suddenly hiding under the covers and living a more “simple life” sounds wonderfully peaceful…

But, imagine if you were at the top of your career. You had all the accolades you could possibly get in your industry. Made your money. Seen your success. And you could do your work with your eyes closed, not even having to think about it. Really imagine that for a second, and think about what that would feel like…

MY GUESS IS IT WOULD FEEL BORING AF!

Nothing more to pursue, no challenging day, no need to rise to the occasion and show ‘em what you’re made of… seriously boring. You probably wouldn’t want to show up anymore. You would probably be itching to find something new to do with your life.

So, if experiencing some level of imposter syndrome is kinda inevitable in life (and sucks), but the alternative would be completely boring and also not what we want, how do we deal with it so that it doesn’t stop us, or keep us small where we are?

I have a ton of exercises and tips around this, but today, we’re going to look at 3 key things to keep in mind:

1) Remember that there is a huge difference between being an imposter, and being someone in the beginning stages of your journey (whether that be in a traditional career, starting your own business, etc). Every person who you see as being more (insert quality here: qualified, smart, knowledgeable, gifted…) was in their own infancy stage at some point.

The way through this? Keep going. Keep creating. Keep pursuing. I would imagine that the first reels you create are not going to be your best. Post them anyways and keep moving forward. Every micro thing that you do towards your goal will add up to get you where you want to be, because it’s all giving you information and practice every step of the way. And that’s how we move from beginner to epic.

2) Remember that every time you’re on the precipice of something new, or trying to level up in any area of your life, it might naturally feel like you’re an imposter, simply because you’ve never done this before. When you’re leveling up, you are stretching, and stretching is always a slightly uncomfortable experience, even though it’s wildly good for our health.

First time you get a client in your business.

First time you have a big $$$ launch.

First time you win an Oscar.

Makes sense that you might think “who am I to get this?!” simply because you’ve never received and held it before. Your nervous system has to make space to receive it and hold it. And that’s a natural and beautiful part of the process.

3) Ask yourself: What in my life is currently mis-aligned with what I’m working towards? I’ve found that imposter syndrome sometimes pops up when something I’m doing is not aligned with what I say I’m doing. You want to be a relationship coach and start working with high-ticket clients, but haven’t yet experienced a deep, committed relationship of your own (and all that it takes to really go through it with a life partner). You are a fitness instructor, but are closing down the bar every night, and missing your own 6am workout. You are a writer, but you are not writing or self-publishing anywhere. You are a money coach, but you’re actually really stressed about your finances in your personal life.

Now, I’m not saying that you might not still be great at what you do if you’re not personally experiencing it at this moment in time, but the feelings of inadequacy and feeling like a fraud will seep in if there’s a huge mis-alignment between what you are trying to do, and what you are actually doing.

So check in, get honest with yourself, and see if there’s anything that could use a little recalibrating.

And then go back to number 1 & 2, and remind yourself that everyone starts somewhere, and rather than being an imposter, you might just be on the precipice of something wonderful and new.

Keep going.

Keep going.

Keep going.

Love you.